BDSM - FETISH - SEXUAL FANTASIES
BDSM Basic Principles
The international community linked to BDSM has placed special emphasis on the practices being SSC, that is, Safe, Sane and Consensual (safe, sensible and consensual), term coined in 1983 by David Stein. His ideologist defined it in the following way.
BDSM relationships must follow a safe, sensible and consensual way regarding their practices:
• Safe, in terms of the necessary knowledge on its development and on the material used, as well as on the prevention of risks.
• Sane, in terms of the reasonable capacity of decision on the part of the actors, not altered by drugs or drinks and according to the experience of each participant, knowing how to differentiate fantasy and reality.
• Consensual, in that the participants agree on the form and intensity with which they are made, and also that said agreement can be rescinded at any time.
However, what in its beginning was a definition created to demarcate the field of consensual sadomasochism of the abuse (on which the American society maintained a severe prevention), was developing in some small groups models of intransigence very far from the purpose initial and the methodology of its creators. This led David Stein himself to distance himself from the abuse that some people made of his slogan.
Since the nineties a new concept has emerged, the Rack, which brings together a large number of activists around its definition. Rack is the acronym for Risk Aware Consensual Kink, which has been translated into the Spanish-speaking community as an assumed and consensual risk for practices of alternative (or unconventional) sexuality: racsa. The racsa puts the accents on the responsibility of the participants in a BDSM activity, informed and consensual responsibility to evaluate and assume the risks of such activity. More than a semantic difference or concept, the supporters of racsa try to modernize a definition (that of the SSC) that was conceived fundamentally to draw a dividing line with the abuse or gender violence, but that their own promoters have had to to recognize, time and time again, that his original purpose was being defrauded and prostituted by the intolerant, extremist and unintelligent use of some marginal groups within the BDSM community.
Most of the activists on the scene currently adopt the position of pointing out the SSC definition as adequate to communicate with the world of conventional sexuality or vanilla, while maintaining that the term racsa defines with greater rigor and precision the real BDSM practices.
Given that many of the situations during a session contain elements of fantasy and role, and that in some of them the "protest" of the submissive participant was staged, it was necessary to create a communication system that allowed him to make clear the moment in which his protest was real and amounted to the desire not to continue. And it was necessary that the dominant could clearly perceive this desire and differentiate it from the staging of "no, no more!" That could be part of the agreed sexual game. The solution was the so-called "security word". It can be a word of quick diction and sound («stop», «tango»), one that is meaningful for those who must remember it (for example, the name of a family member, etc.).
The word-code, also so-called, is used by the submissive party to indicate quickly that the degree, circumstances or activity that is being developed is not to their liking and that they wish to stop. The ethics of the BDSM prefers that at all times the dominant party will respect said manifestation and interrupt the activity.
The first verifiable mention of the concept is recorded at the end of 1992 and refers to some phonetic clarifications that appeared in the circle of German activists S / M-Szene:
The security word should not contain phonetically faint sounds, to avoid its bad hearing with ambient music. It also must not contain the vowel "i", since it is difficult to understand if the voice is taken.
The word of safety is the means to use in cases of real urgency, when the need to go to the bathroom arises, it is remembered that the cock of the bathtub has been left open, the other part is sliding a goose down the plants of the feet of the submissive person, without knowing that it has unbearable tickling in that area, or when you want to interrupt the session for other reasons.
Its use is generally undisputed, especially at the beginning of a relationship, but it also contains some risk, as Datenschlag makes clear:
Leaving too much to the codeword can sometimes harm security. In the case of emotionally deep games, you can find the part that is too abstracted and immersed in your emotions to use it.
Within the BDSM community, there are other minority forms of contemplating the use of the word of security, especially for metaconsensus practitioners. For them, the passive or submissive part yields voluntarily and after consensus the full responsibility on the development of the session to the active or dominant party. In those cases, it is the active party that decides whether or not to interrupt the session, which presupposes (in addition to prior consensus) a high degree of trust and knowledge between both parties. Finally, the activists of the Old Guard reject the use of the word of security, to understand that it is an unwanted limit in the delivery.
In the BDSM, two roles are identified: dominant (also used the term top, or active) and submissive (also bottom or passive). The dominant is the one who enjoys these practices while maintaining the initiative and control of the action, while the submissive party gets pleasure by surrendering to the dominant, so that it is he who directs it.
In addition, some people like to exercise both roles, depending on the time or the person with whom they act. In this case, we speak of an activist switch, an English term that designates what is capable of commuting or reversing an action or a phenomenon.
There are categories also within the different roles:
• Tutor: is that person already experienced in the BDSM that initiates another. It can be exercised in any role, that is, a submissive person can be the guardian of a Dominant. However, the most common is that a Dominant exercises as a Tutor of another Dominant or a submissive.
• Teacher: Master is considered to be that dominant who exercises his role impeccably in the eyes of the submissive, which is the one who gives this title if he considers it.
• Dominatrix and Master: Dominants owner of one or several submissives.
• Slave: submissive who gives the limits to his Master or his Dominatrix.
Consensus - Consensual: Refers to the voluntary and mutual agreement in BDSM relationships.
The consensus that is established in all BDSM relationships is precisely what gives it a specific content, distancing it from any situation of non-agreed violence, such as mistreatment, gender violence, etc. Like sexual consensus, it makes it possible to distinguish clearly when two people are making love and when, in the absence of this, a violation occurs, likewise comparing a BDSM session (despite the appearance of verbal or physical violence) with a The situation of mistreatment would be like trying to compare the night of love of a couple with the infamy of a rape.
This form of consensus can take many forms. For example, by staging a negotiation prior to the session, in which the how, the when and the degree of the activities to be carried out, the safety word to be used, etc. are established. But it can also take the form of a less elaborate agreement, when there is ample confidence on both sides. In any case, its existence is always basic for the activity to be developed is framed in what is called BDSM. There are also formulas of global consensus, especially in couples that are known or are usually related. In these cases, there is not always a prior negotiation before each session, but often pacts are established more open and longer term.
The metaconsensus is an evolved form of consensus, typical of some very advanced BDSM relationships in mutual knowledge and where there are situations of deep trust between the submissive and the dominant part, in addition to supposing extensive experience on the part of the latter.
In such relationships, the submissive party explicitly states that it does not wish to assume the responsibility of interrupting the session in the case of feeling that it exceeds its limits or capacity, but that it wishes that the dominant party take that responsibility and decide at all times about. This implies, for example, that the submissive party assumes in a responsible, consensual and sensible way its desire that, in case of begging to terminate a specific activity (or the session as a whole), it is the dominant who decides to accept or not that request. Metaconsensus was practiced in a very generalized way in the historical beginnings of BDSM, the so-called Old Guard era, although it was better known in Anglo-Saxon circles with the somewhat confused name of consensual non-consensuality.
As a result of popularizing the SSC concept in the community, the metaconsensus became more disused and did not return to a relative relaunch until the 90s, although its practice continues to be a minority in the BDSM community. It offers the "advantage", for the submissive party, of not having to worry about the development of the session, since it will be the same dominant that interrupts it, if it thinks it is being too intense, without needing to wait for it to manifest it. . This is especially important in cases where the submissive part is in a state close to ecstasy, the so-called sub-space, which may occur during a session. Despite this, many of the people incorporated into BDSM after the Old Guard period believe that metaconsensus is a practice that carries significant risks and therefore considers it within the limits of the community.
Thanks. This article contains a total-partial extract extracted from the one published on wikipedia.org
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